The Hanged Man

Or Change Your Perspective

I met with some friends last week for some much needed inspiration. Life has been, well, like it’s been for everyone for the last almost-two-years: really busy, constantly changing, and really hard. Everything changed, several times. Everyone’s angry or rude. We’ve been isolated and have lost our social graces and the ability to relate kindly to another human. Meeting with these friends reminded me that life is all about perspective and how we perceive our situation. Sometimes what we need is simply to change how we look at things.

The Hanged Man in the Tarot is about a couple of things. One of them is to simply pause and reflect, another is that you should view your situation from a new perspective.

In April of 2015 I wrote a blog post here about Perspective v. Perception, and was encouraged to repost the lesson, as it certainly seems as timely today as it did almost 6 years ago.

My house sits on almost an acre of property in the middle of orchards. Some of that is maintained, and a large “lawn” down below our house is part of what we maintain – or try to. I have a riding mower, thank heavens, and there are mature fruit trees planted in the lawn that you have to mow around and under. We water this lawn with irrigation water, so we’re literally re-seeding it with dandelions as soon as we mow them all down.

One summer day, I was standing on my deck overlooking the field of dandelions below. Already cursing the thought of running over them in the mower, the little white fluffs flying into the air sticking to the sweat on my skin, getting in my ears, eyes, and up my nose. As I stood there, already imagining batting them away and trying to get them out of my nose, my youngest son (who was 4, I think?) came up beside me and stood on the bench and looked out at the field with me.

“MOOOOOOOOMMMMM!” He patted my arm excitedly, his little eyes sparkled as he looked out at the field of shaggy grass and soon-to-be-flying weeds. “Look at all the WISHES!”

Bam. Reality check from a 4-year-old.

I looked out and saw only work and hardship. I cursed their very existence. He looked out and saw unlimited wishes and potential dreams coming true.

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We were both looking at the same field of grass and dandelions, but the difference was how we chose to see them.

My husband has Multiple Sclerosis. I can look at that and bemoan the fact that he can’t feel his hands or feet, or hate that he can’t walk well or very far. I can mourn the loss of freedom for him and, by default, me.

Or I can change my perspective.

His MS progressing has pushed us into a healthier lifestyle we never would have even considered before <cough, cough, Wahls Protocol>. I’ve seen people go out of their way to be kind and helpful to him when he’s fallen down, or stuck with his walker, or patient with him when he walks slow. Seriously folks, there are good people out there everywhere. If he didn’t have MS we wouldn’t be on this health journey, and it’s quite possible I would have lost all faith in humanity.

When I was with my friends whining that I hadn’t written in 6-9 months – all I did was write at work (boring legal stuff, not the cool worlds I create!) My friend reminded me that what I had really been doing was practicing my scales. Musicians practice boring, rote stuff all the time to sharpen their abilities and keep them fresh. That’s what I had been doing. I had, indeed, been writing the entire time I thought I wasn’t. I was simply practicing my scales in preparation for this month and my own NaNoWriMo adventure. Perspective is the difference, and I have his word (SCALES!) he wrote on a restaurant napkin where I can see it to remind myself.

So, my request of you, my reader, is to take stock of a situation in your own life you’re unhappy with and pause and reflect on it. How can you change your perspective? How does that change your situation?

What do you see?