Resolve to Refocus

This is it, blog post #91 and the last post of 2016. Maybe it’s the winter solstice, the long nights, or the cold weather, but I’ve been spending a lot of time reflecting on the last year. I took an amazing trip to Hawaii and camped with my husband and two youngest sons in Hana, I stay-cationed the heck out of our deck and backyard pool, and went on an incredible trip to New Orleans with some wonderful friends. There also were some not so great things, things I want to change or make better in 2017, and that’s the inspiration for today’s post.

In my accountability group we were to list 5-7 things we want to focus on in the next 12 months.  Mine were:

1. Mother & wife
2. Family & chosen family
3. Finances
4. Enterpreneur
5. Household
6. Fitness
7. Enjoy life

Then we were to write a short, specific sentence about what those goals were. Mine are:

1. Mother & wife: Continue family dinner Wednesdays and make a point to do something individual with each child and The Best Husband Ever at least once per month.
2. Family & chosen family: For those of you who don’t know, my chosen family are those people who aren’t bonded to me with blood, we’re bonded with love. I will send “thinking of you” cards, or texts, or phone calls once per month.
3. Finances: Create a monthly budget – and stick to it.
4. Enterpreneur: I want to make at least $2,000 per month by writing or other businesses to make up for my decrease in wages.
5. Household: Spend at least 1 hour per week or 7 hours total each week on my grounds/gardens, and 30 minutes each day or 3.5 hours total each week on animals. I will even combine these so that when I’m outside working I will throw the ball for the Labrador With Never Ending Energy.

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6. Fitness: I will exercise at least 12 days per month and drink at least 80 ounces of water daily.
7. Enjoy life: I will read at least 4 hours weach week, plan movie/game night, chaperone scout camp and cold toes (winter scout camp), plan stay-cations with TBHE, and plan Worldmark trips for us as a couple and us as a family.

For the sake of brevity I didn’t write down all the specifics, but you get the idea.

Now it’s time to focus on being successful at keeping my resolutions. I know there are a bunch of ways to increase my chances of success, and for me the main one is going to be setting realistic goals for myself. For example: “Fitness” doesn’t have to mean finally running that half-marathon I’ve been trying to train for over the last four years, it can mean exercising 12 days per month – and exercise can mean elliptical, yoga, hiking, running… even shoveling snow for 45 minutes.

As I look forward at what I want to prioritize this year, I also reflect back on 2016 and the things I don’t like: I don’t like the extra weight I can’t seem to shake, I don’t like the fact that my husband’s legs don’t work very well, I don’t like having a messy house and gardens that are all weedy. We all have things we don’t like, or aren’t working for us, and this year I’m going to use that dislike for the things I can’t control, and refocus it on the things I can control.

In order to be successful with my 2017 priorities I will need all the energy I have. I only have so much energy, and instead of giving my energy to anger and frustration for the things I can’t control, this year I resolve to take the words of Elsa to heart and just “Let it go.” This year I resolve to let go of the negative energy I spend on things I can’t control, and refocus that energy on the things I can.  I can’t control the fact my husband can’t walk more than a half-mile any more than he can (he can’t), and instead of being frustrated about it, I’m going to refocus my energy on the things we can do and find new things to enjoy together.

This week, my reader, I invite you to reflect back on 2016 and think about what worked, and what didn’t.  Think of the things you didn’t like, and what ones you actually have control over. Write down 5-7 things you want to prioritize next year. Then write a short, specific sentence about what that goal is and how you’re going to do it. Lastly, but perhaps most importantly, I invite you let go of the stress over things you can’t control, and give your energy to the things you can.

My thoughts are my own, but my pictures are generally found on Pinterest (you can find anything there!). If you like what I write, please share with your friends or someone you think would like it! I’d love it if you follow me on Facebook (Melissa Gale), Instagram (write2unpack), or Twitter (@write2unpack). If you have any topics you think I should talk about, reach out to me at write2unpack@gmail.com. Oh, hey, and if you sign up here to follow me you’ll never miss a post!