Write2Unpack

I had an epiphany this weekend. My family is going to Hawaii in March – that means this body has to be “bikini ready” in around 3 months AND we’re neck deep into the holiday season. The season of feasts, friends, family, and those delicious creamy hot drinks – not good for my waistline.  I’ve been doing yoga once a week for sevaral months now, but I’ve been looking on Pinterest (yes, Pinterest) about different yoga poses to help melt the middle and tone up my arms & legs. My goal this month is to start doing yoga 4-5 times per week, which is what sparked this week’s post topic and my Top 10 Reasons Yoga is Sexy:

• Yoga bodies. Yoga bodies are toned and shapely. A man who practices yoga has toned arms and shoulders, and remember how magical a man’s chest is? Just think how great a yoga man’s chest is. 

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• Strength. People who practice yoga are physically strong. There are poses that require hand stands, one legged stands, and a various assortment of body manipulations. Not only are their bodies strong, but yoga strengthens minds. And a person who is strong mentally and physically is definitely sexy.

• Flexibility. A body that can bend and twist in all sorts of angular ways is fantastic! Not just flexibility of body, but yoga can increase mental flexibility as well. Increased flexibility can lead to more adventurous play in the bedroom physically and a more playful, adventurous person emotionally.

• Open minded. A person who practices yoga is generally more open minded. They have let go of the need to judge or criticize themselves or others. Acceptance of self and of others is sexy.

• Sanskrit sounds cool. The language of Sanskrit is amazing and tremendously expressive from “rati” which means passionate love and “prema” which means a pure, selfless love, yoga poses (or asanas) have super cool Sanskrit names. My favorite poses are Salamba Sirsasana (supported headstand) and Shivasana (corpse pose), which, incidentally is also my best one.

• Improved health. Yoga has been shown to improve your immune system – especially the inverted poses. People who are healthy are sexy.

• Not only does yoga teach us to be more balanced in our bodies, but it also brings with it a mindfulness of our emotions and how they impact our health. A man or woman who is emotionally balance is undeniably sexy.

• Yoga teaches us to ground ourselves, both physically and mentally. It provides us a means to ground ourselves and exist in a state of peace – or at least the means to return to a state of peace when we need it. Someone who is calm and peaceful in the face of adversity is absolutely sexy.

• Along with a toned body, strength, and peace comes confidence. Someone who is sure of themselves and knows what they want and that they can have it is sexy.

• Yoga pants. I don’t need to say anything else and you totally get this one, right?

So this week, my reader, I encourage you to practice yoga. Take a class, watch a video, google some poses, and practice the mindfulness that yoga brings knowing that your bodies are getting stronger, healthier, and unquestionably sexier.

Namaste.

I love input, so please feel free to leave me a comment below or find me on Facebook (Melissa Gale) and connect with me there. Oh, and sign up to follow me. It’s easy (if you’re on your cell go up to “Menu” then “About Me” and scroll down to “Follow Me”) and you won’t miss a post!

First, let me explain.

Rain can mean sadness and tears, rain can be purifying or cleansing, rain can be what makes two people seek shelter – or one person can shelter another from the emotional “rain” that is drowning them, but today I want to talk about the top 5 things I love most about rain. Not a torrential rain, or a slight misting of water from the sky, but a nice steady rain.

• The smell of rain. I’m very much a smell-person and there’s something so invigorating about the way the world smells when it rains. It smells fresh and clean. As if Mother Nature has taken a deep breath and now the world can breathe again.

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• The peacefulness and softness of the world when it rains. I love the sound the rain makes when it’s falling steadily. My favorite is when there are no other sounds, as if I’m in a vacuum and the only thing I can hear is the soft pat-pat-pat as the rain falls and touches the trees and gardens around my house. I grew up in a rural area, and our house had a metal roof. I can’t count the times I went to sleep listening to the rain falling outside and the sound it made on the roof.

• Dancing in the rain. There is something wonderfully sexy about someone who is so whimsical, lighthearted, and spontaneous that they’ll dance in the rain. You can control many things in your life, but you can’t control the weather.

• It’s comfortable. Whether you’re holed up in a warm house looking out, or outside with a loved one. There’s something so embracing about the rain. I love hot tubbing with my husband in the rain (or snow). I love the contradictory experience of being surrounded by warm swirly water when it’s cold and rainy. It’s comforting, romantic, and it makes me feel like I’ve found a little bit of paradise in a world that can be cruel. And besides, anyone can love you in the sunshine, but it takes someone special to love you with soaked hair and mascara that looks a little like Alice Cooper.

• Kisses in the rain. O-M-G… That’s right. It’s so amazing I’ve turned into a teenage girl and am talking in text-speak.  There’s not much hotter than soaked shirts clinging to skin, water running in rivulets down the side of his face… The weather often influences our mood, and guess what happens when the intensity of a kiss matches the fierceness of the rain? Wowsa!

This week has been super rainy, and so I wanted to remind you that rain is romantic. An unknown author said, “Raindrops are quite possibly the bravest things God has created – they’re never afraid to fall.”  Let that be a reminder to you this week. Get out there and breathe deeply, kiss passionately, dance in the rain, and don’t be afraid to fall.

I love input, so please feel free to leave me a comment below or find me on Facebook (Melissa Gale) and connect with me there. Oh, and sign up to follow me. It’s easy (if you’re on your cell go up to “Menu” then “About Me” and scroll down to “Follow Me”) and you won’t miss a post!

My days are filled with talking to people who are emotionally damaged. I work in the legal field and the attorney I work for does quite a bit of family law (divorce, residential schedule changes, child support…), which means the people I talk to are generally not at their best. Those whose lives have pivoted and everything they used to have has suddenly changed, and they are struggling through their own grief and pain while trying to minimize the impact on their children.  Not an enviable position.

I have a friend who is just tiptoeing into this arena. He’s sweet, and kind… and broken. Not completely, but broken enough he’d be easy prey in the dating realm. This got me to thinking, “What is it about the emotionally wounded that attracts certain types of people?” You’ve all seen it, or maybe you’ve been the one targeted? It’s like a drop of blood in a sea of sharks. What’s the draw? What’s the attraction? What’s the allure? And then I realized… it’s the vulnerability.

We’re all attracted to someone who’s chosen to make themselves vulnerable. Someone who trusts us enough to expose a tender part and allow us to feel with them. They have the hope and belief that we’ll not hurt them, that we’ll accept their pain and love them. But when someone’s been hurt at such a deep level, there’s a vulnerability about them that isn’t voluntary. Their exposure isn’t based on trust or confidence, they’re helpless to hide it and so desperate to hear that they’re smart, or funny, or attractive that they’ll believe anyone who seems even slightly sincere. Sometimes they realize the predator is just that, but it’s so nice to feel wanted that it doesn’t matter. (Yes, that is The Voice of Experience you hear).

Attractive as vulnerability is, that kind of vulnerability isn’t sexy.  What is amazingly sexy is someone who’s been so wounded, who has felt the pain, and managed to heal himself so that when he does reach out the choice is his.  When I see someone like that I see them as if they have been healed by Kintsugi.

(Nerd alert: Kintsugi is the Japanese art of repairing broken pottery by using a lacquer that has a dusting of gold, silver, or platinum.  It not only restores functionality, but adds beauty and worth.)

I prefer people who are real.  I’m most attracted to those who do not conceal the damage or hide the repair, but allow the healing to show. To me they are even more beautiful than when they were whole.

The fears of the people I see in my office are no different than that of my friend: to be alone. With the exception of the few, the many of us are designed to be loved. We need touch, we need affection, and we need companionship.  This week I heard a song by Marianas Trench called, “One Love” that seemed to sum up that fear. The video portrays a man who feels like it’s raining on the inside, suffocating and drowning in his tears and sorrow, afraid that he’s lost out on his one true love.

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Being alone is a valid fear, and shared by almost everyone I’ve ever talked to, but also one that almost always goes unfulfilled.  Once they make it through the breaking, and allow the healing to occur, they will find someone to trust and can choose to be vulnerable. That makes them “wonderfully wounded.” That kind of vulnerability is undeniably attractive.

So what do I want to say in this week’s post? I guess I want to say that it’s ok – or at least it will be. We’re all broken. We’re all in some stage of healing. Be kind to others and pay attention when someone shows you their seams.

I love input, so please feel free to leave me a comment below or find me on Facebook (Melissa Gale) and connect with me there. Oh, and sign up to follow me. It’s easy (if you’re on your cell go up to “Menu” then “About Me” and scroll down to “Follow Me”) and you won’t miss a post!