Last week we talked about the lost art of writing love letters, and with the world being consumed by anger and hatred it’s more important than ever to tell our loved ones that we love them. That’s why this week we’re going to talk about how to write love letters.
1. Love letters are timeless. Telling your loved one isn’t a thing of the past. People want to know how loved they are. Showing them through actions is how some people express love, but telling them that you love them – why you love them, is something they can hang on to and go back and re-read when they need it and you’re not there to show them. Bottom line: People want to know how loved and appreciate they are.
Love letter from Johnny Cash to June Carter Cash
2. Don’t worry about making it sound like a “love letter.” Don’t try to sound like anyone else. Your loved one loves you, so just write like you normally write. Be open, be honest. Love letters should expose you, your feelings, and make you vulnerable.
3. Don’t worry about length. If you’re not a wordy person don’t worry about trying to create a 50 page dissertation on “The Glories of <Name>.” Write what you want to say, what you feel, and then stop. Whether it’s 10 pages, single spaced, front and back – or 3 lines. What’s important is that you do it.
4. The little things are the big things. Small details make love letters super personal and intimate and will make your loved one feel like you see and know them, and they’ll love you for it. One of my favorite love letters from The Best Husband Ever is a card he gave me out of the blue, and sounds just like something he’d say. It’s not lyrically beautiful, or filled with prose and reasons why he loves me, but it’s so much him that I love it.
My husband’s idea of a love letter.
5. Don’t get hung up on how it looks. Love letters don’t have to be on fancy paper or be written in a beautifully scripted hand. Little drawings or notes on scraps of paper are great for love letters.
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There are a ton of on-line resources for writing prompts, “open when” letters, and books on how to write love letters. Samara O’Shea has written a great book called, For The Love Of Letters, you can find it here on Amazon. She talks about how to write love letters, break up letters, apology letters. One of the things she suggests on writing love letters is to follow a past/present/future format:
Past: Write about when you first met, the moment you fell in love, or a certain time when your love was deepened.
Present: Write about the little things you like about them that you see every day. Maybe you love the way they brush their hand across your back every time you pass, or their sleepy eyes. My husband loves my morning hair – he calls it my “Rock Star Hair.” He loves it and I love him for always smiling (but not laughing) at me when I first get up in the morning.
Future: Write about what you’re looking forward to and things that you want to accomplish together. Are you planning a trip? Are you looking for your first house? This will let your loved one know that you’re here and in it for the long haul.
So this week, my reader, I ask that instead of posting something that will polarize and only spread anger, share love. Write a love letter. Write a note to a trusted friend, send a card to someone far away telling them you’re thinking of them, or write a letter to your lover telling them how much you love and appreciate them. It’s not important how you do it, the important thing is that you do it.
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