I had my nails done this week and while sitting there, captive for an hour and listening to the people speak around me in a language I couldn’t understand, I got to thinking about social etiquette. Speaking in another language that you know another person can’t understand is considered rude, (except in nail salons?) because it purposefully excludes another. Whispering also purposefully excludes another, but is acceptable in certain situations (say, you need to quietly excuse yourself) and, if done right, whispering can be sexy. That’s today’s post: How to be a Sexy Whisperer.
We whisper secrets, wishes, and desires. We’ve learned from when we were children that there are just some things that you don’t (or shouldn’t) say out loud. There’s another reason to whisper: in addition to being super sexy, whispering makes us feel good.
You know that tingly feeling that starts at the top of your head and runs down your spine? That actually has a name – Autonomic Sensory Meridian Response ( or ASMR). Oh sure there’s science and studies around it, but put succinctly ASMR are “sounds that feel good.” Need a for example? Try Bob Ross and his “Let’s make them happy trees.” As great as Bob Ross’s voice is, and as good and relaxed as we feel listening to him, let’s get back to the sexy part of whispering.
What to whisper to a guy. When whispering in a guy’s ear, it’s about the words. Oh sure, the closeness factors in, but what really winds him up are the words you use. So what do you say?
- Whisper something that gives him the promise of more to come. (“Just wait until we get home/I get you alone.”
- Whisper about something he can’t see. (“I’m so cold because I don’t have panties on.”)
- Whisper a hint about a sexy game. (“I left my panties in the kitchen. Can you find them for me?)
How whisper to a girl. That’s right. With girls it’s more of a “how” question than a “what” question. Many guys think they need to say something cheesy like, “I want to lick you head to toe.” Or “I must be hunting treasure because I’m digging your chest.” Yeah, while funny, that’s not really what gets us going. So how to turn us on with a sexy whisper?
- Get close (and be sure you smell good)
- Touch us (gently) on the shoulder/back
- Whisper strong enough that we can feel your breath, “these words don’t matter as much as the closeness/smell/low sound of your voice.”
- Pull back.
- Then either lean in again for another whisper, or let us come to you. Lean in and whisper in her ear and she’ll be captivated, lean in and whisper to her face-to-face and she’ll focus on your mouth.
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I wrote about a sexy whisper in my (hopefully soon-to-be published) story.
“Joshua wraps his arm around me as we dance, pressing our bodies together. He holds my hand against his chest and my other arm wraps around his shoulder, keeping him close to me. That’s how we dance: swaying slightly, feet offset, and barely moving. He raises his hand and slowly brushes my hair behind my ear and then back from my shoulder. He lets his fingertips gently caress my back and arm on their way back to hold my hand. His chest swells against mine as he brings his head down to my neck, quietly breathing in my perfume. I can’t help but to smile as I whisper in his ear. My lips inadvertently brush against his ear, and a shimmery tingle blooms on my lips where they’ve touched him. His arm tightens around my waist as he laughs, his stomach and chest rippling like waves against mine. Such a good feeling. It’s as if the gesture was entirely nice and sweet. There is not a single ounce of sneaky, or conniving, or manipulation in it. I’d like to say it was meant to be cleverly sensual, but it was unintended. I think that is what made it so amazingly erotic.”
Melissa Gale ~ “The Between”
My thoughts for you this week: If you want to be a sexy whisperer, all you have to do is believe in the power of proximity, the warmth of your breath, and the softness of your voice.
Oh, and 10,000 brownie points if you can guess what Alex whispered in Joshua’s ear.
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