Category Archives: Write2Unpack

I was 7 when Mount St. Helens erupted.  The house I grew up in was 9 miles (as the crow flies) from Mount St. Helens. I remember the tremors in the days and months preceding the eruption, the way my parents would frown and sigh at the new cracks in our walls from the shifting ground, and I remember the eruption. The earthquake was like nothing that had happened before, violent and everywhere. The massive ash cloud blocked the sun and turned a beautiful May morning into dense black night. People lost their lives, and homes were destroyed, but at 7 years old my world largely consisted of my family, friends, and a few neighbors. After the eruption I remember collecting the different layers of ash to keep in a jar (dense chunky stuff first then eventually the dusty powdery ash), wearing those masks sick people wear to keep the ash out of my lungs, and my father swearing because he had to change the damn air filter in his patrol car every day.

Today’s post isn’t about St. Helens, or the power of nature, but I wanted to take a moment and give a nod to The Powers That Be. (Check out this article about the eruption) If St. Helens had erupted more westerly, or if the winds hadn’t carried the massive ash cloud to the east (sorry Central Washington), I wouldn’t be here to write all these fabulously inspiring posts. So let’s get on with the inspiration, shall we?

Last weekend I attended the local writing conference – Write On The River. As I sat in class, I started musing about how some writing lessons are universal, and… presto! We have this week’s post.

Writing Truth #1: A good story has a beginning, a middle, and an end. In the middle is where you need to have obstacles for your main character to overcome – this allows them to change into what they’re supposed to be at the end. Our lives have a beginning, a middle, and an end. In the middle is where we face obstacles that allow us to learn and grow, changing us into what we’re supposed to be at the end.

Instead of facing each problem with a negative “why did this have to happen to me?” attitude, I’m trying to face each difficulty with a more positive, “what am I supposed to learn from this?” attitude.  Sometimes it works.

Writing Truth #2: Writing is best when it’s supported and encouraged by others. Our lives are best when we’re supported and encouraged by others.

Our lives are shaped by those around us. Surround yourself with people who inspire and uplift you.  I’m not saying you should never have problems (see Writing Truth #1), but surrounding yourself with people who love you and encourage you to grow is a great way to become the best you.

Writing Truth #3: Sometimes the bad people are the good people. Have you ever read a book and hated that one guy who was really just the worst person in the whole world, and then you find out that he’s been taking care of his cancer-ridden mother, raising his mentally ill brother, and working 2 jobs while battling the banks who are trying to foreclose on the house his father built?  Sometimes (often) things are not what they appear to be.
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We all have demons that chase and howl after us. You never know what a person has gone through, or what demons are currently clawing at their heels.  Before placing judgment, take a moment to find the real truth in a situation. And if that terrible person really is a terrible person – well, at least you did the right thing and can move on to find someone who’ll support you (see Writing Truth #2).

Writing Truth #4: There’s always a shortage of good writing in the world. There’s always a shortage of good people in the world.

There are a ba-jillion good books that have already been written, but there’s always room for more good writing and good books. Just like there have been a ba-jillion good people in the world, but there’s always room for more good people. And hey, wouldn’t you rather live in a world with more good writing and more good people?

Writing Truth #5: There’s only 1 rule to writing – “It’s got to work.” There’s only 1 rule to your life – “It’s got to work.” Your life is just that, your life. The choices you’ve made have brought you here, and what works for you may not work for others – and that’s ok.

Writing is my passion. I love it, I hate it, I need to do it.  I have a friend who loves numbers (she’s a Capricorn) and gets all giggly and hand-clappy when she and my husband (also a number lover) talk taxes, spreadsheets, or QuickBooks.  My love of writing and of people doesn’t make me lesser or better than my friend, just different.  We’re all different.  Discover what you’re passionate about, what works for you, and do that.  Oh, and remember that it’s OK for someone to like, dislike, or crave something you don’t.

There are universal truths everywhere (that’s why they’re universal…), and this week I was drawn to share some that I realized from my time at the writing conference.  My wish is that they resonate with you, inspire you to be kind, and seek out your passion. After all, your life is the story you’re writing.

My words are my thoughts, but my pictures are generally found on Pinterest (you can find anything there!). If you like what I write, please share with your friends or someone you think would like it! I’d love it if you follow me on Pinterest, Facebook (Melissa Gale), or Twitter (@write2unpack). Oh, hey, and if you sign up here to follow me you’ll never miss a post!

This week at work I was attacked 3 times by spiders. Luckily, I work with a bad-ass-ninja-spider-killer who understands my fear of spiders and she saved my life. That got me thinking about fears. We all have them, and I’m pretty sure there’s a phobia for every kind of fear imaginable. Some of the most common fears that aren’t commonly known:

Pistanthrophobia – Fear of trusting people due to past experiences with relationships gone bad.

Atophobia – Fear of being alone.

Kakorrhaphiophobia – Fear of failure.

Atelphobia – Fear of not being good enough.

Coulrophobia – Fear of clowns.  (Ash, that one’s for you).

Today’s post is about Fear, not phobias. A phobia is the most common mental health disorder and is described as, “the experience of persistent fear that is excessive and unreasonable.” I have arachnophobia. I’ve injured myself, and others, trying to get away from spiders. I know (logically) they’re smaller than me, I can just squish them, and they’re (probably) not there to hurt me – but none of that matters. A spider must not touch me at any time. Ever.

Fear is an emotional reaction to a real or perceived threat. That’s natural. We fear sharks because they could hurt us. We fear dark alleys because there might be someone dangerous in there. Will Smith is quoted as saying, “Fear is not real. It is a product of thoughts you create. Do not misunderstand me. Danger is very real. But fear is a choice.”

Fear keeps us from experiencing new things, potential long-term relationships, a new job… essentially Fear can keep us from experiencing love, joy, and happiness. So if fear (not phobia) is a choice, how do we overcome it?

Fear feeds on inaction, indecision, and waiting for “just the right time.” Defeat Fear by doing something. Take action, take a first step, make a decision – now.
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Fear feeds on negativity and hopelessness. Say “I can do this” instead of “I can’t do this.”

Fear feeds on feelings of unworthiness and the unknown. Imagine the worst possible outcome and how you might feel. Now imagine the best possible outcome and what you could feel and feel worthy of the good. You are worthy of the good.

Fear feeds on perfectionism. Accept the fact that you’re going to make mistakes. Everyone does. Learn from them. You’re not moving forward if you’re not making mistakes.

Fear lies. Look for the truth, the actual truth, in any situation. Breathe.

My message to you this week, my reader, is to make the choice to not let Fear win.  I used to have a fear of being perceived as “foolish” and would make decisions to do (or not do) things that might make me appear foolish. In an earlier blog (this blog) I talked about my friend Steve. We used to talk on the phone every so often about good days, bad days, why mustard is infinitely better on hotdogs than ketchup… really anything.  I had just talked to Steve on a Monday and a few days later felt like I should call him, but I didn’t because I felt foolish calling again so soon. Steve died that Saturday.

A powerful lesson The Universe taught me that day and I am mindful to heed it. I am no longer afraid of being thought of as “foolish.” I reach out to people when I feel the need to do so, I compliment people when I like their clothes or they have a nice smile, and I’m honest when I don’t know what to for someone even though I think I should.

Feel the fear and do it anyway, even if you have to do it afraid.

My words are my thoughts, but my pictures are generally found on Pinterest (you can find anything there!). Feel free to follow me on Pinterest (Melissa Gale) or Facebook. I love feedback, and invite you to comment or e-mail me with your thoughts. Signing up to follow me is the best way to make sure you don’t miss a post!

I love music. Anyone who knows me knows music is a huge part of my life. I don’t play any instruments – unless you count playing the flute in high school band, and I don’t sing exceptionally well – except in the car, then I sound just like Norah Jones, Rhianna, and a host of other amazing singers. My iPod has everything on it from Luciano Pavarotti and Snatam Kaur to Nine Inch Nails and Charm City Devils. For the last few months I’ve been fan-girling pretty hard over a certain country singer. He had a cross-over hit that I heard and loved, so I YouTubed it to watch the video. After it was over another song automatically started. It was the same singer playing one of his songs acoustically. He’s very easy to look at and the video had such an intimate feeling – just him and his guitar. I watched him play, captivated by the way he sang and how his fingers moved on the strings and neck, and I was pretty sure he was singing just to me. That song and the feelings behind the lyrics touched me and inspired this week’s post. It’s a song about being lonely, and not wanting to be – if only for one night.  Something we can all relate to.

This song was originally written by him, but later recorded by Kenny Chesney and released in 2012. I’ve listened to that version (which is great), and the version my mystery singer recorded on an acoustic album (which is also great), but my absolute-all-time-hands-down-favorite version is the acoustic YouTube version that found me. Here’s my story taken from watching him and listening to him play this song.  I’ve re-titled it to make it a little more of a challenge, but see if you can guess the artist and song by the end of the story.

***

Climbing the Walls

Melissa Gale

“God I hate late night TV.” Sam mutters as he clicks off the only source of light in the room.  He fusses with the sheet as the old farmhouse sighs and shifts around him. It’s been in the family for generations and only recently became “his” after his parents passed away last year.

Lying in his bed he listens to the clock ticking from the next room. He can almost feel the weight of the pendulum in his great-grandfather’s clock as it goes back… and forth… Exhaling loudly he reaches over to grab the TV remote and asks, “What else are you going to do?” and clicks it back on. Falling back on his bed he stares at the ceiling and watches the blades of the fan on their annoyingly calm orbit.

And they’re making a left turn… And they’re making another left turn.. Sam never really did understand the fascination with NASCAR – much to the disappointment of many of his friends.

“Wrong question.” He says snapping his fingers. “It’s not what are you going to do, but who are you going to do.” Sam sits up on the edge of the bed, picks up his phone and searches through his contacts, scrolling through the names and thumbnail pictures until he gets to… her.

“I shouldn’t do it. I told you I wouldn’t call.” He says to the picture of her blowing a kiss. “You said we were through.” He loved that picture of her, but hated her damn ring tone. For the 3 years they were together every time someone called he knew he’d be listening to Big & Rich’s “Save a Horse, Ride a Cowboy.” She always insisted on following it up with a “whoop whoop” and a little “raising the roof.” God he hated that song, but what he wouldn’t give to have her and her damn ring tone right now.

“She may have said we’re through, but she’s a terrible liar.” He says to himself and taps his head with the phone. “And since when did ‘what you should do’ become a factor?” Sam lies back down looking to the fan for a solution.

“We’re bad for each other, that’s for sure, but we’re no good for anyone else.” Sam laughs. Memories of that night out in the field run through his head. Just the two of them in the back of his pickup with the moon and million stars. He explored her whole body that night – she was so warm, so willing. Oh God, the way their bodies moved together…

Groaning Sam looks at the phone screen and talks to his reflection. “Look. You said you wouldn’t call her. You don’t care, remember?”

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“What if I just asked you to come over? Would that be alright?” Sam asked her picture. “Let’s not fix each other. It doesn’t have to be a forever thing, just come over and warm my bed for the night.” Making the decision Sam touches the picture of her kissing lips with his thumb and her number lights up the top of his phone.

Putting the phone to his ear he stands up and walks across the room. His feet make a soft padding noise as he makes his way down the stairs towards the living room, already thinking about sinking into his dad’s old recliner. Skimming his fingertips along the handrail, generations of varnish and kids sliding down it has left it pleasantly smooth, he wonders if she’ll answer.

It’s late. He thinks as he listens for the connection on the phone. Maybe she’ll be pissed.

Then he hears something. Wait. What was that? Did I really just hear that? Sam changes course and heads towards the front door.

He hears the phone ring on the other end of the line and then Big & Rich start singing just outside his door. Peering through the window he sees her answer her phone as her voice caresses his ear. “Sam? Is that you?”

***

Well? Can you guess it? Good luck, and “May the fourth be with you.” (Yeah, that’s right, today’s is May the 4^th and I couldn’t resist!)

If you can’t guess, or even if you can, here’s the link to the video that inspired the story.  Check it out and let me know what you think about the song and my little snippet of story.

My words are my thoughts, but my pictures are generally found on Pinterest (you can find anything there!). Feel free to follow me on Pinterest (Melissa Gale) or Facebook. I love feedback, and invite you to comment or e-mail me with your thoughts. Signing up to follow me is the best way to make sure you don’t miss a post!