Author Archives: Write2Unpack

Have you ever had The Perfect Kiss?  You know, that one kiss that was so memorable and perfect that you remember it still today. I was sitting up late one night with The Best Husband Ever visiting (yes, even after 16 years of marriage we still do that) and we got to discussing kisses: first kisses, best kisses, bad kisses, and of course… The Perfect Kiss. He’s a damn good kisser, we had a lot of fun trying out different kisses that night, and I thought it was a super interesting idea and totally worth a blog post.  That’s how this month’s inspiration found me – in a late night discussion about kissing.

I’ve talked about kisses before in a couple different blogs. This one talks about The Best Kisses and we discuss the benefits of kissing, how to kiss, a couple of favorite spots, and this one where we discuss where to kiss, the importance of touch when you’re kissing, how words can be like kisses when we’re apart, and what’s actually in a kiss (spoiler alert: love, sadness, and forgiveness are a few).

Now, arguably, you could say that there are many perfect kisses: kisses that are full of love, longing, and passion, but I don’t want to talk about the little perfect kisses that pepper our lives. I want to talk about That-One-Kiss.  The kiss you’ll remember for all time.

For me that kiss found me when I was in college. When we kissed… the world spun away from me.  I remember it still and wrote about it in my (hopefully soon to be published) novel.

“Evan whispers my name as he kisses me. Not rough this time. This time soft, tender, full of love. I smile as we kiss, lips slightly parted and the tip of his tongue lightly brushes against mine. A breath of warm moves through me. That kind of warm makes me tremble, and my breath quickens when his tongue touches me.

Kisses like that can last a lifetime. Sometimes they have to, don’t they? Sometimes we hang on to kisses like that and live them. We cherish them and hold them tenderly in the easily accessible area of our brain and go back to retrieve them whenever we want, or are in need. Sometimes, if we visit that place often enough, kisses like that will stay with us as if they’re real. Sometimes kisses like that last as long as we need.”

The relationship didn’t end up working out, but I still remember that kiss. Not all kisses were so great, and The Perfect Kiss doesn’t have to be the first kiss. First kisses can be amazing, anticipated, and aching, but they can also be awkward, clumsy, and surprising – in a bad way. I dated a guy in high school who was super sweet, good looking, funny, and kissed like a hoover. Seriously, I thought he was trying to devour my entire face. It startled me and messed up my makeup. We didn’t date for long after that.

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I was (a lot) younger when my Perfect Kiss found me, which made me wonder: does age matter? As we grow and mature and become more sexually experienced does that lessen our chances for The Perfect Kiss?  It refines our kissing skills and makes us better lovers, we know more about what we want and generally what the other person wants, but does that somehow lessen our chances to have the knee-buckling-world-spinning-free-falling-perfect-kiss?

I have a friend who described her Perfect Kiss and how she “fell an eternity in a couple of seconds.” Powerful stuff, right? There’s powerful magic in The Perfect Kiss and I believe it finds us when it’s supposed to, even if the relationships don’t end up working out in the long run. She was a grown woman when her Perfect Kiss found her.

Perfect Kisses can be different. They can be passionate, tender, in the rain, on a beach, lip kisses, or forehead kisses. I think the one thing that all Perfect Kisses have is love – absolute, unconditional, forever love.

This month, my reader, I want you to kiss with intention. Fill your kisses with love, promise, hope, forgiveness, and maybe… an eternity.

My thoughts are my own, but my pictures are generally found on Pinterest (you can find anything there!). If you like what I write, please share with your friends or someone you think would like it! I’d love it if you follow me on Facebook (Melissa Gale), Instagram (write2unpack), or Twitter (@write2unpack). If you have any topics you’d like to talk about, reach out to me at write2unpack@gmail.com. Oh, hey, and if you sign up to follow me you’ll never miss a post!

This week a writing mentor sent me a paragraph or two of his writing and asked me what promises he made me, the reader.

As a writer, it’s critical that we keep the promises we make to our readers, or they’ll drop us in a hot second.  It’s brilliantly put, and I wanted to share this week’s inspiration with you.

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Keeping Our Fictional Promises

By Mark Neher

“Our readers want many things from each story once they commit to reading. Some crave a genre and others need a tone. Some like dialogue and some want poetry from stone. Most read in isolation so they won’t feel alone. They might like science-fiction, romance or humor. They may like a salad with a bit of each, a phenomenon with a tumor.

Children need once upon a time. Young adults seek angst, preferably with arrows and secret weapons well animated. The middle aged want to recapture or fast forward, and the old are grateful for the moment. But what do they all have in common? What does every reader want?

They want the truth. They want us to keep our promises. As writers with good intent we are all the same. Our objective is to make our story seamless except for the dramatic natural breaks every good story requires to change direction or drop a third stage rocket and maintain a trajectory with a change of speed. There are many ways to create the narrative, but the voice behind the curtain will be revealed in the end. Each character has to be true to themselves to deserve the readers rewards for their time in the green room stocked with emeralds and a multitude of gems, and treatments for even the hardest case.

I see someone in the back row clicking his heels together and I’m about to drop a house on your writing desk. We have no idea what we are capable of writing, unless we learn from everything written before and decide to be even better because of the sacrifice of our predecessors. Brilliant becomes possible in flashes when you really want it. Bugs you the rest of the day. You are a writer. People hang on what you say. Especially what you promised to sell a book and sacrifice a reader’s day.

Here is the point… most writers build a world and aren’t god enough to hold it together. Your memory is enough if you are gifted with one of those, otherwise what you create has to have a diary, a log to burn to sit by and load you’re your kindling onto the fire. If you have a head to hold it all then cheers, but if not we need to keep track of where we squirrel away our walnuts or what we bury won’t do a bit of good when we spring from our tap roots.”

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My life is changing again. “Yeah, right. Just like everyone else.” you say. It’s true. Life changes for all of us, and I’m no different. With my reduced hours at work comes a reduced paycheck – that’s a big change, and I’ve not been able to successfully figure out quite how to make up the difference yet.

One of the reasons I reduced my hours was to be more present as a mom and for The Best Husband Ever, and another was to focus on writing and really try to figure out how to break into the “making some money” side of writing.  This blog, while a great way to quiet some of the noise in my head, hasn’t lead me into the MSM writing yet, so, I think it’s time for a change.

I’ve written and posted 110 weekly Write2Unpack blog posts in the last 2 years (including this one). I write about things that are sexy, encourage others to be better, kinder, more loving humans, and about lessons that are present all around us – especially from our pets.

What does that have to do with keeping promises? This week I’ve been thinking about the promises I made you, my reader, when I started this blog.  I promised to spend time, every week, reaching out to you and hoping to touch you with my words. I promised to inspire you, to encourage you, to make you laugh, and, sometimes, to make you wonder.  I hope I’ve kept my promises.

I’m going to change my blog, but I haven’t quite figured out the “into what” yet.  I want to continue keeping my promises to you, and make new ones.  I may cut down my weekly posts to a lesser amount, write short stories that (hopefully) make you laugh, cry, or love more.  Maybe I’ll devote more time to my Living With Jeff blog and website, maybe I’ll tell you stories from songs and have you guess, maybe I’ll roll my blog posts into a book of short stories and self-publish, or maybe I’ll devote more time into re-re-re-editing my manuscript and find an agent/editor who believes in me like my husband and fellow writers do.

I know that I can promise you this: I’ll continue spending the time, each week, writing to you with the hopes that what I write reaches you and resonates. I’ll continue to seek out inspiration from everyday occurrences, and share them with you – you deserve that. Besides, keeping promises is sexy.

So this week, my reader, I ask that you watch for me. Find me if you need. I’ll be here, plugging away and working diligently at kicking some writing ass. I promise.

My thoughts are my own, but my pictures are generally found on Pinterest (you can find anything there!). If you like what I write, please share with your friends or someone you think would like it! I’d love it if you follow me on Facebook (Melissa Gale), Instagram (write2unpack), or Twitter (@write2unpack). If you have any topics you’d like to talk about, reach out to me at write2unpack@gmail.com. Oh, hey, and if you sign up to follow me you’ll never miss a post!

I was talking with The Best Husband Ever about how sexy and attractive it is when a guy is nice. You know, common courtesy not being that common. I like it when a guy holds the door for me, looks me in the eye and pays attention to the words I’m saying, or smiles and waves me in when I’m waiting in traffic. That got me to thinking, “Why is it they say nice guys finish last? Do nice guys really finish last?” And so this week’s inspiration found me musing about common courtesy.

Every girls says she wants a nice guy, but nice guys always seem to get the short end of the stick. So, DO nice guys finish last? My thought… yes. Here’s why:

The Bad Boy: The excitement of being with someone who shirks societal norms, someone who practically oozes confidence, and has a reputation of being a bit of a “player.” Girls like that. It’s exciting and invigorating to be with someone like that, and super confidence building to be with someone who’s so confident themselves. But who wants to have a long-term relationship with someone you’re never quite sure is devoted to you and only you?

The Nice Guy: Someone who remembers to bring you flowers, every time. Text messages you regularly and as expected. Agrees with everything you say, even when he doesn’t.  These guys are great for first dates. They treat a lady well and are so agreeable if you want Thai and he’s allergic to chilies and garlic he’ll tell you it’s a great idea.  The reason he’ll finish last is just that. A Nice Guy will never stand up for himself. He doesn’t believe he’s worth the fight and thinks he’ll never get what he wants. He’s scared to do what he wants to do and actually live his own life.  Great for first dates… not so great for long-term relationships.

The Exceptional Man: Women want a man who is sure of himself, has control over his life, and can take care of things his way. Someone who treats people well and will stand up for his values. A man who is confident, loving, and devoted to his girl – but not afraid to stand up to her either. He’s open to having difficult conversations, and will address things head on. He’ll fight for you, but he won’t beg. This guy will give a girl the mystery of The Bad Boy, the chase The Nice Guy won’t, and the devotion and care a long-term relationship requires.

So there you have it.  Nice guys will finish last because he won’t stand up for himself like The Bad Boy, and he doesn’t have the lasting strength of The Exceptional Man.  It’s ok to be nice, the world needs more nice people, but don’t pretend to be something you’re not just to get that date – that’s just being a douche. (See this post for more tips on how not to be douchy).

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This week, my reader, I encourage you to be exceptional. Be confident, treat people well, deal with difficult things head on, and love deeply.

Oh, and guys, a little tip for you that I tell The Best Husband Ever: I always know exactly what I want. It just always changes.

My thoughts are my own, but my pictures are generally found on Pinterest (you can find anything there!). If you like what I write, please share with your friends or someone you think would like it! I’d love it if you follow me on Facebook (Melissa Gale), Instagram (write2unpack), or Twitter (@write2unpack). If you have any topics you’d like to talk about, reach out to me at write2unpack@gmail.com. Oh, hey, and if you sign up to follow me you’ll never miss a post!